As a therapist who has worked with so many victims of sexual trauma I’m amazed by the outpouring of women AND men who’ve come forward, but unfortunately I am shocked by some of the responses from both men and women as a result. Let’s get one thing straight, sexual violence is not about being a pretty face or dressing suggestively. It’s not about women trying to get ahead or being willing to exploit themselves for the sake of fame. It’s about our society’s belief that some people have no other value aside from their sexuality. It’s not about being coquettish or playing coy. It’s about our society reducing a female’s value to that of a sex object. It’s not about men being led on, sex addicts or dawgs. It’s about men being raised to feel as if they have more worth. It’s about men believing they are entitled to sex without consent. It’s not about sex trafficking, it’s about the demand the world has for buying sex. It’s about it being acceptable to call women sluts, whores, bitches, the c-word. It’s about women being portrayed as emotional, gold diggers, dramatic, unreasonable, or a burden. It’s about girls being told that when boys are mean they actually like them. Violence is about power and control, so let’s stop giving men with atrocious behavior the ability to exert it. How about we allow kids to be innocent and not sexualized (Toddlers & Tiaras). How about we rename The Real Housewives to The Real Women (entrepreneurs, advocates, mothers & role-models). How about we let women choose how they express their sexuality, not categorize them as either good or bad. How about we compliment little girls on more than just their pretty dress or cute smile. How about we stand up against sexual violence, not just because we have a daughter, mother, sister, aunt, girlfriend, niece or wife, but because we are human beings. Whether women run fortune 500 companies or fabulous households, it all comes back to respect. We’ve already made so much progress and despite thinking Weinstein took us 50 years back, I believe it will help us move 50 years forward. I’m feeling pretty hopeful, hope you are too.

Here’s to the next 50 years, 

-MGN
Authentically,
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